"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).

This one verse lists at least three essential elements of marriage as God intended. First, a man shall leave his father and mother. Wilson’s Old Testament Word Studies indicates that the word "leave" as used in this text means to relinquish, desert a covenant. Of course, no man is expected to abandon his parents. We are to honor our parents for all of their lives. But when a person marries, his (or her) relationship with his (or her) spouse becomes more important than any other earthly relationship. There may be times when it is wise for a young couple to go to their parents for advice. But no one should get married and expect his (or her) parents to make their decisions for them. To those of you who are married, remember, no on earth should be more important to you than your spouse.

Second, a man is to cleave unto his wife. The word "cleave" means "to stick, as things that are glued together." When two people are married, they are not joined together by man only, but also by God (Matthew 19:6-9). Who can be married in God’s eyes? Those persons who have never been married, those persons whose spouses have died (Romans 7:3-4), and those persons who are innocent of fornication but have put their spouses away because of fornication (Matthew 19:9). Contrary to what is reflected in so much of our society today, marriage is intended to be permanent in its duration (I Corinthians 7:39).

Third, they shall be one flesh. They shall be one flesh in terms of their physical relationship (I Corinthians 6:9-11, I Corinthians 7:2, Galatians 5:19-21, Hebrews 13:4, Revelation 21:8). How else do they become one flesh? In terms of their name, their interests, and their goals. Neither the husband nor the wife loses his (or her) individual identity. (After all, the scriptures indicate that a man has specific responsibilities to fulfill as a husband and the wife has specific responsibilities to fulfill as a wife.) But when a husband and wife become one flesh, they are able to act together, as an individual unit. Each spouse is to look after the other’s needs as well as his or her own. Decisions are made with the best interest of both partners in mind.